A few weekends ago, a late anniversary escape with the Mrs. led us to Newport, Rhode Island.

The itinerary included two nights at the historic Viking Hotel, a couple of enjoyable meals, some shopping near the water and the obligatory “Breakers” tour. I’m sure it’s quite the sight at any time of year, but during Christmas season, with the holiday lights on full display, it was at another level.

Before you know it, Sunday morning checkout time arrived and after a couple’s massage (don’t judge…you know you love them, too!) there was just enough time left for one last choice; see the mansions via the scenic “Cliff Walk” or hop on a guided tour bus. Mother nature being a little frosty that morning, the decision wasn’t all too difficult.

The bus driver/tour guide was entertaining enough. A native New Yorker based on the accent, he provided the perfect mix of historical info and sarcastic barbs about the Gilded Age denizens who made Newport what it is, and the modern day wannabes like Jay Leno and Taylor Swift who have scooped up some of the prime dwelling units.

All in all, the tour affirmed we’d made the right decision, especially since it eliminated any temptation for the wife to push me off a cliff.

One problem though; the driver/guide either made a major historical error, or he outright lied, not realizing there were two Lowellians watching the wheels on the bus go round and round and the wipers go swish, swish, swish.

Early in the tour, the bus drove past the Bellvue Gardens shopping area we’d visited the previous day. He made a point to highlight one of the stores.

“See that CVS right there” he  proclaimed. “The original building was called Consumer Value Store and it was the first CVS location in all of America.”

(SCRATCH!!!!!!! went the needle)

That can’t be right, I thought. Looking over at my wife, I could tell she was thinking the same thing. A quick google search confirmed our suspicions, though we kept quiet so as not to embarrass our host or sour the experience for others on the bus. But as the 90-minute tour progressed, I couldn’t help but wonder what else being offered as historical fact was pure B.S.

Was that really the first baseball stadium in the United States? Does pop icon Swift really only spend two nights a year in a home she paid a whopping $17.75-million for? Did the Gilded Age men really turn the library into a speakeasy during Prohibition to avoid being home with the wives? And, perhaps most questionable of all, were we really an enjoyable tour group?

See, that’s one of the problems with those of us from the Lowell area. Not only do we THINK the world revolves around the Mill City, our rich history often confirms it DOES. And as we all know, the first Consumer Value Store (CVS) in the United States opened right here, in Lowell. Their own website says so:

The lesson, of course, is before giving a history based tour, ask your passengers where they’re from. If any say Lowell, double check your talking points, or kick them off the bus. They’re usually not as quiet as the wife and I are.

Newport, you can keep bragging rights over who has the more gaudy mansions. But the first CVS store was, and will always be, from Lowell, Massachusetts.